What should i do with my life?

EXCUSE the shitty formatting, sorry.

So far my answer is either go for a walk or I don't know. I sat outside and had a long chat with my neighbor and realized that when it comes to life in general, I am not really getting my fair share out of it. People would say oh you are a parent, it comes with the territory. Yeah, maybe it does but that isn’t the point when you look at the big picture. How do you spend your day? I mean seriously, break it down and analyze how you spend your day. Mine goes a little something like this.

1)      Wake up to the girlfriends alarm and listen to her hit snooze for an hour.

a)      Set it 45 minutes later and get some extra sleep? WTF?

b)      Constantly complain about being tired all the time??

2)      Lie in bed and be pissed off when my alarm goes off reminding me I could have slept for the last 45 minutes.

3)      Get up, piss, get dressed, get my shit, and get out the door to work.

4)      Ride my motorcycle in shitty traffic for 30 minutes when I could leave at 8 and it would be 50 times better and only take 15 minutes.

5)      Get to work, log into my stupid ass phone that I am tethered to all damn day long unless I decided to use the restroom.

6)      Take calls from people and listen to them complain that they don’t know how to use our products because the notion of reading a user’s guide (watching instructional videos) ***LAZY*** is foreign to them.

a)      This is the sole purpose that google was invented, to do your own research and look up information on your own without having to have your hand held through everything like a complete and total idiot.

7)      Breaks and lunches: pretty much suck now that I quit smoking and don’t feel the need to go outside; all I want to do is close my eyes and forget where I am at during these times.

a)      Boss and other people perceive this as sleeping and bitch that I am sleeping at work when I am just trying to regain some sense of sanity to help me make it through until the next break or the end of the day.

b)      ** We need a room for this at work.

8)      FINALLY! Time to go home. Those 10 seconds of enjoyable thoughts were short lived. (no more calls)

9)      Rush hour traffic, carpool lane with a shit ton of people in it by themselves (FUCK YOU if you do this BTW) and not to mention, it’s usually hot as fuck if it’s not November –February.

10)   Get home and have maybe 5-10 minutes to myself. One of the best parts of the day right here. *summer time, jump into the shower immediately as much as possible due to the desire to cool off.*

11)   Everyone is either home or walking thru the door. Glad to see kids and girlfriend for a while because genuinely happy and smiling faces are almost foreign to me all day long.

12)   10-15 minutes later if I am that lucky, kids begin to either fight, argue, or some other form of disruption of peace that brings the whole enjoyable evening crashing down like the Hindenburg.

13)   Dinner disaster. Either they want it and don’t eat it or can’t seem to concentrate long enough to completely finish it without getting up and doing something in the meantime.

14)   Nighttime rituals such as bath time, pajama time, or bedtime, typically met with eardrum shattering resistance along with the occasional tantrum. Argument ensues on who is the child and who is going to bed when they are told.

15)   Lying in bed trying to relax and go to sleep, typically a rerun of the 27^th time of Criminal Minds is playing on the TV becoming too distracting to go to sleep immediately or even get relaxed enough to go to sleep at a decent time.

16)   Girlfriend proceeds to pass out mid episode and nasal chainsaw roars to life within 5-10 minutes.

17)   Average time to actually lay there in quiet and go to sleep begins anytime after 11:45 pm and stretched out until 2 am. (wake up time is 5:45 – thank you girlfriends alarm)

So there you have it, a day in the life. Let me remind you, this is a typical day, a more common one during the week. So when I say that I think the only possible time I will have for myself is when I go for a walk, please also keep in mind that I hate walking, running, jogging, or any of that kind of stuff unless it is necessary or I am being chased, which rarely happens. Counseling? Im starting to think I don’t need it yet, I just need some time to myself to clear all the bullshit from my day and figure out where to change the fouled up events I have control over.

If life was so easy, it would be much more manageable and enjoyable.